Step One: Know What You Want and Need

Almost everyone has a friend (or had one in the past) that always gets into terrible relationships and always complains about the gay guys he dates. Why can't I just find a good guy to settle down with? he'll say over and over again. Sometimes the relationships get into dangerous territory but most of the time it's the same problems happening over and over again. That's a case of a gay man having no idea what he really needs out of a relationship. He just knows he's attracted to a certain type of guy and he doesn't bother thinking about it. He doesn't realize that the problem with all his bad relationships is him; he's into guys that are bad for him for myriad reasons too complicated to get into. .

You don't want to be that guy. You don't want to cycle endlessly through bad relationships that all end the same way. That's why you need to discover what you want and what you need from a relationship (they're most certainly two different things) and put that information to use. Let's talk about the superficial stuff first. What kind of man are you looking for? What hair color do you like the most? What sort of body do you want your partner to have? Do you like hairy or smooth? There are countless questions and you stand a better chance of establishing a long term relationship if you can answer them before you head into the dating pool. You can always visit a gay site and have a look at the guys if you need to discover your preferences..

Knowing what you need is much more difficult. That requires genuine introspection, which is a tough task for anyone. Think about the relationships in your life that have been the most fulfilling. What was the other person giving you? These don't necessarily have to be romantic relationships, either. Typically, the deeper elements of what satisfies you in any relationship will carry over with your partner. I know that sounds a little vague, so let's try to get a bit more specific. Here's a for instance: do you like the idea of being the supportive, protective one in a relationship or do you want it the other way around (or neither)? It's the deeply emotional stuff like that that will end up ultimately charting a successful course for a relationship. If you're matched up on a deep level you'll fall in love in ways you've never imagined..

The beautiful thing about your brain is that it frequently pairs you up with someone that gives you exactly what you want emotionally. Unfortunately, sometimes what your brain wants can be harmful to your long term emotional health and you need to correct it. You can find a successful relationship and have the best gay sex of your life if you remain mindful of your needs both emotional and physical and find the man best suited to fulfilling them..

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Step Two: Present the Best Version of Yourself

Everyone has a best version of themselves and if you're looking for a relationship then you should strive to present that version to the world. If you're 20 pounds overweight and soft all over because you haven't been to the gym in 10 years then it's time to ....
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Step Three: Put Yourself on the Market

Even if you haven't completed step two, which can take a while, it's wise to put yourself on the market and start the dating process (if you're just looking to hook up and have good gay sex you can pretty much do that at any time). Gay guys aren't above . ....
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Step Four: Learn to Approach the Man You Want

There's great appeal in the idea of a man walking up to you, introducing himself, and telling you that from the moment you walked in the room he's been unable to take his eyes off of you. If that line is even half true it means he's really into ....
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Step Five: Seal the Deal

You know what kind of man you want to date. You've done research on gay sites and you've fantasized about Mr. Right. You've transformed yourself in the best version of you possible. You're brimming with confidence. You've started talking to ....
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